I am angry and, at this point in time, not even contemplating offering forgiveness to the person I feel betrayed me.
It’s a pattern. One that is fueled by a lust for attention, and if truth doesn’t provide it, lying can.
It makes it all the more vile that this betrayal was not limited to me and mine, but extended to others close to me. That the duplicity was not from one person, but aggravated by a second.
My frustration is multiplied in that confrontation by me will be futile. Any attempts by me to show how similar events were not simply a misunderstanding, have historically been met with defensive denials. This is not the first time rumor and lies have recklessly been presented as facts.
I shared this latest incident with my adult daughter. She has access to information I don’t, and I wanted her to monitor this information for any further attempts to pass on these lies. Her reaction both pleased me (a vehement display of support) and worried me (the level of her vehemence was stunning).
We both agreed that we limit contact with these people, being that completely cutting them off is not a realistic option. Luckily, we do live far enough apart that occasions to be around them are already infrequent.
I’m being purposely cryptic because these lies created and shared were about children, and I don’t want to add insult to injury. But, I am beyond livid.
These people will be told why I no longer wish to be around them, and I have no qualms about walking away. I can’t see them changing and I can’t imagine a heartfelt apology is forthcoming. Two things that need to happen if we are going to have any sort of relationship.
Thin spiral notebook 
Why is it that the toxic people we know seem to have an uncanny ability to spew that toxicity where it will cause us the most anger?
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I’m sorry you have to go through this. I guess we all do at some point in our lives. Often more than once. I love that your daughter is so vehement about supporting you – it shows the beauty of your family unit & love.
Best wishes to you and yours getting past this event.
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I so wish more people would apply the golden rule in life: “If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all.”
I am so glad you are moving away from these people who bring you hurt and anger and pain.
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My Nana used to tell me to “turn the other cheek,” but it sounds like your plan to flat-out walk away is the best course of action. Sending good vibes your way, chica!
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It sounds like you know exactly what you’re doing Tara…albeit hurt, upset and betrayed. Less time wasted around people like this…the better. Cheers to you sweetie… ~Joy
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I might or might not be related to people who are exactly like this. My solution? If you can’t be non-toxic, you can’t be in my life. Period.
Good luck with your situation.
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My daughter (the one whose story you know) had a similar situation last year, where a group of people she considered friends turned on her because of lies told by two of the group. She tried the reconciliatory things one often tries, to no avail. So she gave it up and took her hurt with her. After a time, she came to a resolution: no more toxic people. Some people are just that, leaving a trail of hurt more often than not. Sounds like you have a couple in the two you refer to. The best defense is to do just what you are doing.
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You have taken the best tack. Just remove the offenders, and the offending situation, from constant view/contact/etc.
Life is too short. There is too much to enjoy, and so little time to enjoy it, that any time spent with such distractions is a waste.
Don’t let them waste your time.
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Bobina and I just went through something VERY similar. I can’t share details but trust me we live parallel lives and my wife and I can relate.
a) always take the high road…seems you have
b) move on and don’t give the offending party what they want – attention.
c) believe in what you’ve said and done and that will carry you to where you want to go
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