Just the facts ma’am…

I am a liar.

When friends gush over this or that episode of their favorite TV show, I smugly claim to ‘not watch a lot of network television.‘ In saying that I see myself as somehow above the fray, too erudite to be swept up in the tsunami of reality shows, well-written family dramadies, and the revival of musical theater.

True, I have not seen a single airing of Glee, or Jersey Shore. I have never watched Community, Parenthood or Big Bang Theory.

I couldn’t care less who has talent or who thinks they can dance, who wants to be an Idol or has a Voice.

We don’t have HBO, Cinemax or Showtime so there is a whole host of Must See TV that is completely shut off from us.

When my daughter the sociology grad is home, she and I watch Real Housewives (all of them) and Gangland. There are remarkable similarities in these programs. We also catch a few shows of Say Yes to the Dress simply for me to learn how NOT to be a Bridezilla Mama. It’s all research, an integral component in the study of Modern Pop Culture, definitely not for entertainment purposes.

After our initial subscription to Netflix we did have marathon sessions of Dexter and 30 Rock, but that was all for my husband and daughter’s benefit. I just happened to be in the room when they watched.

Living in a male-dominant home I truly have no choice, unless I exile myself to another room, but I do watch copious amounts of sports ~ racing, soccer, football, more cars, Premier League soccer, and more racing.

I am confessing here and now… my arrogance, my feigned superiority over reputed third-rate television is a sham.

For when I am alone, when there is no one around to judge or castigate, I’m burrowed under a fleecy blanket, propped up on numerous pillows, and unblushingly watching….

…crime shows. All of them.

Law & Order, SVU and Criminal Intent. I’ve been known to slip off to the back bedroom and watch Law & Order UK on BBC America.

All the CSI franchises, except I’m more likely to taunt the screen while watching the Miami version a la Mystery Science Theater 3000. Horatio is a bit much to take sometimes, I keep seeing him as John Kelly from NYPD Blue (same character really).

I think Tim is underrated on NCIS, and Jethro’s detachment is getting a little old.

Love Criminal Minds, but my husband worries about my psyche after seeing how brutal that one can be.

Bones… gotta love a show with one main character with Asperger’s and another who is a former vampire.

Wept after the final episode of Monk.

Then there is The Glade, Rizzoli and Isles, In Plain Sight, White Collar, The Closer, Psych, Covert Affairs, Burn Notice, Cold Case, Without a Trace, Fairly Legal

You get my point. I am a crime junkie. I’ve been known to seek out reruns of Murder She Wrote and Matlock. I’ve sunk so low as to scrounge through the couch cushions of my TV listings for old episodes of Columbo and Rockford Files.

I am unrepentant and shameless.

*Day 1 – 30 Days of Shamelessness: declare your love for an uncool TV show.

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I believe all good fiction includes an element of truth, and all good photography includes an element of fantasy. In this journal I hope to give voice to the stories swirling around in my head, and to capture the images I see through my camera’s lens.

14 thoughts on “Just the facts ma’am…

  1. Bwahaha! I can relate. I have so many friends who go, “Do you watch *insert uber popular show on the moment*?” in hopes of gabbing about it. “Nope!” I say. “I don’t have time to watch much television at all.”

    I reality? I’m addicted to Big Brother, Chopped, What Not to Wear (Seriously, people, just let them cut your damn hair!! It grows back! Gah!), Say Yes to the Dress (Thank GOD I’m married already, I couldn’t take it!), anything ghost related, almost anything on History Channel, oh okay and Food Network. I love me a good CSI or Criminal Minds or Mentalist. Heck I’ve found the humor in shows like Parking Wars. I’m deep down excited about some of the new shows coming on this Fall. Oh and I’ve been known to have marathon sessions of America’s Next Top Model when no one is around.

    But nope! I am too busy for tv. Tooooo busy. I don’t watch a thing. NO idea why I even have cable.

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  2. Oh, I have my addictions to be sure…some of the same ones you have….and others. I blame my son for a lot of it….he’s my supplier. ~Joy

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  3. crime TV is my weakness as well, (but a marathon of [H]ouse trumps them every time!) and like you, I watch them all! even the documentaries of unsolved cases finally being solved, the expose’s on the Melendez brothers, the Night Stalker, and small town who-dunnits. I so miss the days of In the Heat of the Night!!

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  4. The misses and I watch SVU religiously. Stabler and Benson are our best friends. I like how you watch things for “research”.

    ahhhh, Just one more thing Tara, I had this grocery list in my trenchcoat pocket. It reminded me I need to get asparagus and urgula at the market. Then I started thinking….you said you hadn’t seen the gun that shot your husband in what, like 3 weeks? well, i noticed there was this little notch on your finger there and it matches the the way a lady would hold a derringer

    “Ok, Columbo you caught me!!!!!”

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  5. I love almost all of those as well. Except the CSI ones … can’t stand any of ’em. And much as I love BBC crime shows, I don’t really like the Law & Order UK one.

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  6. Seems we have things in common. We don’t have HBO and we don’t watch a lot of TV shows, but I love Closer, Cold Case, Law & Order. Suits is also good, plus House Oh and yes, In Plain Sight (did you catch the season finale?)

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