If you ask my son, I can look a fool simply walking down the hallway. Factor in my terminally lame white girl dancing, it’s enough to put him into sugar shock.
Oh, and the horrors of my singing. Easiest way for me to keep him from listening to music I don’t like, especially when we are both in the same place? Sing…
Back then hoes didn’t want me
Now I’m hot hoes all on me
Then there was this one time, when we were out shopping, and we were driving through the center parking lot, and there was an older couple on the sidewalk, and I had the windows and sunroof in the car open, and Ozzy was screaming from the stereo, and I cranked the volume waaaay passed 11, and I was head banging, and screaming along with him….
All my life I’ve been over the top
I don’t know what I’m doing all I know is I don’t wanna stop
All fired up, I’m gonna go ’til I drop
You’re either in or in the way, don’t make me I don’t wanna stop
One word ~ “mortified.” The Boy could not slink far enough down in his seat.
All I have to do is act like I’m going to sing or dance in public and instantly he doesn’t know me. Hell, it doesn’t even have to be in public. We can be the only two people at home, with just the dog and cats as witnesses, and I can mortally embarrass him.
My reward is hearing, “no, Mom, really no, you have to stop now, no, really stop.”
I, on the other hand, am not easily embarrassed (that is not a dare, just take my word for it). If he wants to sing or dance, I’ll tap out a backbeat.
Y’all gon’ make me lose my mind up in HERE, up in here
Y’all gon’ make me go all out up in HERE, up in here
Y’all gon’ make me act a FOOL up in here, up in here
Y’all gon’ make me lose my COOL up in here, up in here
*Day 2 – 30 Days of Shamelessness: look a fool