I haven’t said much about this before because when I make announcements, I tend to jinx the results. Injury, and inertia were what vexed me in the past, but hopefully, barring another jinx, I can be successful.
For the last five or six weeks, I’ve been out walking and exercising again. (If you follow me on Instagram, hopefully you’ve seen the sunrise shots from these early morning jaunts.)
As for the exercise, I’ve joined with a few friends to workout at a local church. We are all women of a certain age, and none of us will be morphing into swimsuit models any time soon. We’re getting healthier and enjoying the camaraderie.
I’m trying to avoid focusing on quantitative results, and instead look to how my clothes fit (looser), if I can improve my reps or times (yes and yes), if I’m sleeping better (I think so), and if I’m still enjoying myself (I am).
Thursday morning, when I arrived at the church, I met my friend who had initially invited me to join the exercise group. She and I have been friends for close to 15 years. We trained together and walked in a 5K+ back in May.
She told me I looked like I was getting thinner. It made my day. While I don’t think I’ve actually lost weight, just having someone notice my efforts was nice. That the compliment came from another woman, made it all the better.
For me, getting a compliment from a female friend feels more authentic that one from my male friends (The Mister excluded.) I think women are more critical of each other, and more honest. When a compliment is given, it means more, because I think it’s more believable.
Many years ago, I made it a point to offer compliments to my girlfriends when I thought it appropriate. I’d tell them I liked an outfit they wore to work, or admired a new haircut or color. It wasn’t always about their appearance. If they did a job particularly well, I’d mention it, especially in front of co-workers or a supervisor.
When I started doing this, it surprised many of them. A few even commented that they rarely got a compliment from another woman. That should be the norm and not the exception.
We need to lift each other up, support and encourage each other. Tell each other when we’re looking good, when we’re doing good, and when we’re simply kicking ass. When we’re having a craptastic day, we need the praise even more. Spread the love, and see how much it comes back to you.
Thin spiral notebook 
Congrats on the positive results of your efforts! Exercise is always so much easier when you’ve got a friend (or two) to help motivate.
You’re right about women and compliments. I’m going to make a bigger effort to notice good things about my friends and coworkers and be sure to lift them up more often.
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I’m glad you’re enjoying your getting healthier plan. Honestly, given the choice, I would not be up and seeing the sunrise, ever, so big congrats to you on having the commitment! I think the ‘looser clothes, more reps, better time, feeling better’ part is far more important. Muscle weighs more than fat, and frankly, if being healthier didn’t make you feel better, what the hell is the point of it all? It’s definitely nice to hear a genuine compliment from a woman, and a bit more meaningful than from most men. Especially considering that when I chopped off a foot of hair, one of my coworkers (male) asked, “Did you do something different today?”… yup, little bit.
also, i like the new lined paper background… very fitting for a thin spiral notebook 🙂
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Yes. Women tend to reserve commenting because what they are thinking, just isn’t nice. It is sad to think as women the first thing we do is ‘size up the competition’. I have never understood it. Good for you rising above to uplift other females. Maybe, it will catch on. I know I will try to put it to practice.
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I like to compliment complete strangers – usually on their shoes or bag. I’ve gotten those compliments and they do mean more from women.
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amen and amen. it’s terrible to see women bringing each other down. & it’s so prevalent, online & off.
good for you! i had noticed you were getting up with the birds lately. i’m glad you’re feeling healthier.
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Well I absolutely agree with this…I have always said that when a woman tells me that she loves my sweater, she adores my shoes or “WOW Kir, you look wonderful” I smile more that day. Because like you said, we tend to be critical. Being honest, I am very very quick to compliment another woman, her hair, her shoes, (WHERE DID YOU GET THEM??), her purse, her new thinner waist (even if it’s only a lb or two) because I know how much it will mean. I have been known that in the middle of a crappy day of my own, making someone else smile, stand taller, feel BETTER often makes the day a little LESS CRAPPY.
and if my friends are having a very bad day, I do my very very best to lift them up. The best gift we can give each other as women is solidarity and “YOU LOOK MAH-VELOUS” doesn’t hurt much either.
SO HAPPY for you and your GORGEOUS SELF.
xo
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