49 and a half

Drop in the bucket... list

Today, I am exactly 49 and a Half. For those of you who are chronologically challenged, that puts the big FIVE-O birthday in October. (For those so inclined to lavish gifts on the sadly aged,  here’s my ‘Buy Me This‘ List.)

Prior to our teen years, tacking on that ‘Half’ was vitally important. That’s when we wanted so desperately to be grown up. Not so much now.

Say this with me, “I am 50.” Gives me a little shudder.

Pragmatically, I know that it’s just a number, and in all seriousness I don’t FEEL 50, I don’t feel old at all. Not like when I was 12 and actually thought 50 was ancient. My mind has been whirling every time I ponder on my half century birthday. I’m having difficulty reconciling my actual age with my imagined age.

I simply don’t know what to do about turning 50, or if I even need to do anything… other that not-so-subliminally cajole my peeps into some serious celebratory action. (I keep dropping hints that as a Birthday Girl I get free admission into Disney World. Some kids never want to grow up, and I love roller coasters.)

What do I have to show for my first 50 years? What do I want to do with the next 50?

I’m not going to make some unattainable declaration that within x-number of years I will accomplish this or that. I think any sort of deadline only sets me up for disappointment and failure.

I don’t need cruises or lavish vacations. I don’t want luxury cars or huge houses, expensive jewelry or truck loads of money. I’m not interested in amassing extravagant material wealth. There are no delusions of fame or infamy.

I have no plans for reconstructive or cosmetic enhancements. I wouldn’t mind shedding some pounds, but I need to do that on my own… sometime soon.

My marriage is happy, my kids are doing great. Those are my personal life successes.

Besides I have another 50 years to do more fabulous things, right.

So, tell me… what should I put on my ‘Second 50’ to-do list?

9 thoughts on “49 and a half

  1. You are just a ‘babe’ Tara. Try saying 65. I haven’t counted halves for a long time…it only makes it more painful. Beautiful picture by a really beautiful lady…..


  2. i know you wrote this to make my 41 year old butt feel better, thanks.

    Taking time to do an inventory and wonder about our middle-aged lives is a great exercise. I bet your kids and mister would say you have most the most of your first 49 and a half. I sure have enjoyed the last 2 being your friend.


  3. Sadly, you don’t get free admission on your birthday any longer. That was like a one year thing that they stopped (sux). But I love Disney and see no reason why you shouldn’t have a blowout party there. Just be sure you invite me.


  4. Seriously, 50 is not as old as it used to be. Times have changed. Our lives are so much different.
    I turn 40 next year and I’m already thinking about the party. It’s going to be EPIC!!!


  5. Just keep taking more and more of those fabulous pictures – and whenever BlogHer is in Chicago, make sure you’re there. I’ll give you rides to and from the airport. 🙂


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