An indecent proposal

bird in flightI wanted to do this right, to make the moment special, make her feel special. I had a whole different outcome in mind when I began.

We sat together on the couch after dinner. Holding her close, she was tucked under my arm, her cheek resting against my chest.

With my free hand, I squeezed the tiny, blue velvet box in my pocket to make sure it was still there. Gently pushing her up, I muted the television.

“I found your dad, and I went to see him today,” the words I rehearsed for hours tumbled out. “I told him of my intention to marry you, and I asked him for your hand.”

Sliding off the couch, I was on one knee, the box open in my hands, offering it up to her along with my heart.

She shrank away from me, her eyes wide in terror. All I could see were black pupils, dilated beyond the emerald ring of her irises. Her voice tiny and far away.

“Ohmygod, ohmygod, ohmygod,” she stood trembling. “What have you done!”

Pacing around the room like a caged animal, she couldn’t seem to figure out what to do with her hands. Mumbling incoherently, she fluttered her fingers like a frightened bird trying to take flight.

Her panic forced her into the farthest corner of the room. Fingers tips covering her mouth, she slid down the wall until she was sitting in a crouch.

Speaking in a soft voice, I tried to approach her, to find out what was wrong. When I reached out to touch her, she pulled back with a startled squeak.

“He wasn’t supposed to know where I am.” I could barely hear her. “You have to leave, NOW!”

I could only do what she demanded. The next morning when I stopped by to check on her, everything was gone, except for a note addressed to me.

“Don’t try to find me!”

The Trifecta challenge for this week is: Intention [noun \in-ten-shuh\] 3a : what one intends to do or bring about

20 Comments Add yours

  1. twist upon twist – intriguing


  2. Linda Vernon says:

    Oopsie! Super good read! :D


  3. Nice work, Tara. I like it for the questions that come out of it. What make him think it was ok to do that? What did she tell him, if anything, about her father? Will he go in search of her? Terrific!


  4. Carrie says:

    Definitely not what you would expect from that sort of proposal!! Poor guy.

    Wonder why she never shared that little tidbit?


  5. joetwo says:

    The best intentions can destroy the world!


  6. jannatwrites says:

    Great story! I liked it, but I’m as confused as he is – I’d love to know what happened between her and her dad and why she was so freaked out!


  7. Great piece. I’m going to need a follow up soon.


  8. muZer says:

    That’s such a bummer. Wonder what secret she was hiding! Loved reading it.


  9. deanabo says:

    very good. I always say that secrets can kill a relationship before it even begins. Maybe she should have told her love about her father. He could have protected her. Great writing.


  10. atrm61 says:

    What a whammy!There he is-all romantic & believing she would be doubly pleased-his finding her Daddy(bad man,am sure in more ways than one) & his proposing marriage -& then things go downhill!Beautifully written,loved it!:-)


  11. More proof that the only person who you should be asking permission for marriage is the person for whom the proposal was intended.


  12. lexy3587 says:

    poor guy – way to leave him hanging!


  13. This is great, Tara. I really want to know why Dad couldn’t know where she was and where she’s gone.


  14. Kir Piccini says:

    Reminds me of Nicholas Sparks (he has a movie/book out right now SAFE HAVEN that is like this)

    I feel for her, sometimes you find love and it’s just not enough to keep you in one place. The words and language of it were perfect. I really do love reading you.


  15. Jodie says:

    Um.. opps.. well that sucks, talk about leaving the poor guy bewildered. Wonder what she’s scared of.
    Nice job. :)


  16. fun well written piece!


    1. well not exactly fun in tone but fun as in enjoyable to read :-)


  17. kymminbarcelona says:

    Yeah, WHOOPS! Excellent pacing, there, Tara.

    Just to complete my own little circle: as I read, my toes felt like those outstretched talons in your amazeballs photo.


  18. Draug419 says:

    Well…That…didn’t seem to go as planned. o__O Such a great piece though!


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