Holiday burn out

worn

The tree is still up, but the lights are turned off. The scant other holiday decorations are not so much jolly as they are sad. An empty childhood Advent Calendar, abandoned and forgotten, stands rolled up in a dusty corner. Stockings were hung and filled, but just as cavalierly removed from the mantle.

Boxes and wrapping paper were either broken down and stored in the garage, or bagged up and wait at the curb for pickup. Gifts are put away, already absorbed into the day-to-day monotony.

Grandparents were called, or they called. Thanks passed around for presents received, clichés uttered over regrets for not making the trek to visit over the holidays… they almost sounded sincere.

Disposable aluminum pans and reusable plastic bins filled with an abundance of holiday food meant to be reheated ad nauseam during the coming week overwhelm premium refrigerator space. Silent thanks given that the menu won’t be repeated for another 12 months.

Except for whole family being together, a feat becoming more and more difficult to achieve, the day felt like little more than a routine weekend day – lazy and uneventful.

It’s not the commercialization of Christmas that’s the problem, it’s the numbness of the season that has taken the joy out of it.

Maybe it’s just the numbness of everything that has taken the joy out of everything. I really need to find my Happy again.


Submitted as part of Shell’s “Pour Your Heart Out” writing prompt at Things I Can’t Say. Please stop by to read the other posts, and give a little comment love.

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16 replies »

  1. It seems like there is so much pressure at the holiday time to spend time with all of your family that it becomes difficult… driving here and there. Spending what little time you can with each person. What we should really do is make time throughout the year to spend time with family and then maybe the holidays wouldn’t be so rushed and we could all enjoy them.
    I hope that you find your happy soon.

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  2. I’m so sorry you’re feeling like this. I think the holidays have the potential to amplify emotions, so hopefully without the stress of the season you can concentrate on finding a good, happy place again.

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  3. Maybe that’s what it is. Numbness. I keep saying that I enjoy the days leading up to Christmas so much more than Christmas itself. Christmas Day, the sis-in-laws brought their claws out and ruined the day for everyone. I keep wondering why we keep going back, but I know it’s for the parents-in-law who aren’t likely to be around for too many more Christmases. I don’t know, but there sure wasn’t much joy in the day. I guess that makes it easier to move on for another year.

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  4. My Christmas was great because I got to spend the WHOLE day with all three sons in the same place at the same time. There isn’t anything on earth I would rather do more than to be with all three boys, together – even if it’s a simple as watching TV, or watching them interact with each other. THEY give me and my life meaning.

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  5. Uh-oh. I was waiting for this to turn into one of your usual gorgeous and poignant stories, but ummm it wasn’t. I feel for you. The stress of the holidays bites – and so much of it is the forced feeling of obligation to do this or that. I pared way down, fewer cards, fewer presents, less everything than the bare minimum of what we need to spend time with people we care about. It still didn’t quite feel like Christmas this year, but I wasn’t miserable at least. And yes, my husband has already returned 90% of what he bought me – the gift cards and movies notwithstanding. I don’t need anything other than peace and love. Does that even make sense? *hugs* to you – and a Merry Christmas!

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  6. I waited until we got home from our final family get together, tonight, before I commented.

    We are so exhausted emotionally that the kids don;t even want to play their new wii they got.

    It’s too much. The presents, the shopping, the driving around, the family stress from people you see once or twice a year. All I know is, I’m closer to these 4 than I ever have been.

    I think my group is realizing we’re like a gang. We have to stay together, care about each other, and keep everything else at a distance.

    I;m Grinchy tonight.

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